After unintentionally wandering for a long time, I feel that being alone is more suitable for me, and I am also suitable for being alone. It's not that I don't love lively environments, but I find them extremely annoying and frightening. However, as time goes by, I actually enjoy being around some people. But I also think about it, as I see and think more, I also hope that this slow-paced spring and autumn will not be filled with loneliness. It's quite interesting, but also helpless.
The more I experience being alone, the more I appreciate the solitude. The charm of the lonely window has become something I have to let go of. However, it is difficult to express this fortunate feeling, and it brings a sense of loss. Even though I used to feel the same way, no matter how I talk or think about it, it is of no use. Instead, it makes me feel even more desolate and contemplative. I no longer think about writing about this kind of loneliness. It's better to say that I have come to understand or compromise, and I no longer pursue it deeply. But even so, mentioning it in passing doesn't evoke the same sighs and contemplation as before. It can be said that I have seen through many things.
Being alone and being in a crowd are completely different, but they are also very similar. It is the way of life, and it is unnecessary to say how lonely being alone can be, and how noisy being in a crowd can be. It is fortunate to encounter the understanding of "the same clouds and moon, different streams and mountains" and the feeling of "the beauty of the wind and moon, the shallow depth of emotions". However, such words and profound discussions are irrelevant. After going through and experiencing it, I have become accustomed to this embrace.
But I still can't help but have some selfishness. Now I think it is because of my narrow-minded nature or my preference for tranquility that I can't let go of the tea, books, plays, and lyrics in this small building. Fortunately, in this green world, what I see now is the me from the previous life, wearing a simple robe, and in the end, I am sitting at the desk in the small building, calmly holding a pen and returning home. Whether I think about it myself or talk to others, I can't bear to mention the truth and the originality that is different from poetry and tenderness. But the underlying color that often lingers in my eyebrows and heart is just a passing guest and a farewell. You and I are indispensable passers-by in each other's lives, and in the end, we have to bid farewell to another shadow, and we have to bid farewell to another shadow.
Thinking about it, these days can be easily counted, but it is a treasure that cannot be returned once gone. It is entangled in countless struggles, and it is unnecessary to mention the "indescribable taste in the heart" of this feeling. It just naturally comes to mind.
And when you think about it, you don't need to think about how difficult it is to express those indescribable difficulties and brilliance. I have no intention of arguing. I just listen to the song "Suolong Nang" and write a few verses, and I am fortunate to come across a perfect cup of Tie Guanyin tea. I feel more and more peaceful in my heart. It is no longer like before when I think about buying top-grade Tie Guanyin from Anxi, or when I think about buying special-grade Tie Guanyin from Anxi. The charm of the play and the fragrance of the tea are no longer the most important things.
I feel even more fortunate to have found the most suitable moment before my hair turns gray.